What happens if we cant pay for my wifes private student loan?

Private student loans cannot be discharged in bankruptcy. They can certainly go after her bank accounts and wages.

Your various questions about your wife's student loan are a bit complex. You are not responsible for your wife's student loans unless you and she refinance them into a common debt. Don't do that. Also, they can sue her and garnish her wages, but not yours. The best way to protect your money is to have it in your name alone but not in her name. That way the student loan people cannot reach the money in your account. As for your question about community property, New York does not use that legal concept, so that is inapplicable to New York bankruptcy and debtor/creditor cases.

Student loans survive bankruptcy. If the debt is reduced to a judgment it can be enforced. There are many kinds of collection procedures, including wage garnishment and bank levy. Try to make a monthly payment settlement offer.

I think a private student loan is discharged and most jurisdictions, as far as I know, allow non-listed creditors to be discharged by simply sending them a notice of the discharge after it happens. If it was an asset case it's all different. If it's not dischargeable under Bankruptcy law, you can ask for extensions and hardship forebearances. I don't know about community property, but they can attach wages and they can free bank accounts. In case it helps in community property, you can put most of the money in an account in your name only and some in hers.

In the state of Michigan there is no such concept of "community property". The bank can garnish bank accounts and wages.