I'm sorry for your trouble.
Getting a divorce in NY will depend on whether or not your spouse agrees to get the divorce, and whether or not your spouse agrees to divide the assets, arrange the custody and visitation of the children, and arrange any support payments (as applicable).
There will be residency requirements that, in your case, the facts indicate that your satisfy, as you both live in New York, you were married in New York, and some of the treatment to which you are being subjected seems to have happened in New York as well.
To file for divorce in New York, you will need grounds, which is kind of your reason for divorce. They include abandonment, terrible treatment, and a total breakdown of the marriage.
Your child custody issues sound like they may be contentious, you definitely ought to seek counsel before you proceed with this case. Lots of luck to you, Eric Reimer
Answered on Oct 24th, 2011 at 3:35 PM