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My husband and I have been married for 15 years and together 19 and he has cheated on me and says he loves her and wants to end our marriage but he has gone back and forth a few times already between wanting her and wanting me to stay. I actually moved out for a short time without knowing about her. He just said he wasn't happy anymore and needed time to think so I gave him space and moved with a friend temporarily just after Thanksgiving thinking we were going to try to work things out. A few weeks after that, I found out he was seeing her but thought it started after I moved out then found out shortly after that from him it had started a few months before that. Then a couple of weeks later he decided he wanted to try to work things out to save our marriage. He made all kinds of promises about doing all he could to make it work and we talked about seeing if his job's insurance covered marriage counseling so I moved back in but only brought like a weeks worth of clothes and the basics back with me because I actually never moved all of my stuff out and we were both not sure if I would stay. We both went back and forth a little after that about if it could work and if I was going to stay or if I would move out again. Then this past Friday, February 28th he swore to me that it was over with her and made more promises over and over to me including swearing to me that even if he heard from her again that he was not going to change his mind. I never asked him to promise we would definitely be able to fix things all I asked was for him to promise me that it was truly over with her and even if he heard from her again that he would tell her he was committed to trying to fix our marriage. Which he did. Then after plenty of talking we went and moved all of my belongings back here from my friends house and then by either Monday or Tuesday, I can't remember which because my head is reeling from all that has gone on he comes home from work in a mood and finally tells me that he
5 ANSWERS
Domestic Relations Attorney serving Omaha, NE
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Diane L. Berger
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Only you and your husband can decide if you should get a divorce. No one else can tell you how you should feel or what you should want.
Answered on Mar 10th, 2014 at 11:24 AM
Business Law Attorney serving Columbus, OH
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Robert A. Bracco & Associates
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Consult a divorce attorney ASAP.
Answered on Mar 10th, 2014 at 4:56 AM
Estate Planning Attorney serving Wilmington, DE
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Reger Rizzo & Darnall, LLP
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Whether to divorce is a personal decision that an attorney can't make for you.
Answered on Mar 10th, 2014 at 4:56 AM
Commercial Contracts Attorney serving Boise, ID
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Peters Law, PLLC
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This is not a marriage advice site. If you don't love him or trust him anymore, then you need to decide whether it is worth it to you to stay married to him. That is your call, nobody else's. But if you do decide to get divorced, I suggest strongly that you get a local family law attorney to make sure you get what you are entitled to.
Answered on Mar 10th, 2014 at 4:56 AM
Family Law Attorney serving Irvine, CA
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Law Office of Julie A. Ringquist
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It doesn't sound like you are asking for legal advice, but life advice. Find a good therapist and work out what you should do. If either of you make up your mind that a divorce is for the best, then you should be getting your financial details together before you either of you move out. Be aware of all bank and credit card amounts (whether in your name, his name, or both names), know the account numbers for all bank accounts, credit cards, retirement accounts, 401k's, etc. Have copies of your last several years of tax returns and his W2s or 1099's. You may also want to photograph the home very carefully to document furnishings, art, collectibles, antiques, jewelry, so that you can more easily divide things later, or prove they were taken. Also, be prepared to know where all family movies and photographs are located so that you can make sure you each get a full set of copies.
Answered on Mar 07th, 2014 at 9:53 PM