Can I get my daughter-in-law to give me back the money she took from my accout, without going to court

Report online to Adult Protective Services.  The caseworker may be willing and able to confront her -- or not. Hire an elder lawyer to send her a demand letter.  In Texas abusing, defrauding or exploiting an elder is a first degree felony. Neither of these may work.  Then hire a lawyer to file a Motion for a Temporary Restraining Order.   Whatever you do, get her off your bank account.  If she or your son is your agent under a Durable Power of Attorney, revoke it, grant a new one to someone else and record the revocation and the new Durable Power of Attorney in the county deed records and send them a copy. It can be hard to face the fact that there is a thief in the family.  But it is all too common.