can i get a divorce even though my husband doesn't agree to it

The short answer is 'yes', you can get a divorce even if the other spouse does not want to be divorced.  There used to be a time when a person was not allowed to get a divorce without the consent of the other spouse, but that was a long time ago.  However, you should be aware that it might be costly and take a longer time.  I have had divorce cases that took 6 years to complete because the other side kept using delay tactics, which also increased the costs to both spouses.  I have also had cases where there was initial push-back but where the other spouse finally realized that the marriage was over and the divorce was actually completed in a relatively short period of time.  It really all depends on the people and the specific situation. I really suggest you have a consultation with a divorce attorney in your area to find out more about the laws of Virginia and how they would pertain to your circumstances.