Can I get in trouble for not letting my sons father talk on the phone an have his monthly visit with my son when he failed to provide details and lied

If there is a court order in New Jersey governing visitation or parenting time, both parties are legally obligated to follow its terms—even if one believes the other is acting improperly. Unilaterally denying visitation or communication in violation of a court order can potentially result in contempt proceedings or negatively impact your own custodial rights. That said, if you have a good faith belief that your child's safety is at risk due to unauthorized individuals being present during visits (especially where there has been deception and an instruction to your child to "keep secrets"), you may be justified in seeking a modification of the existing order. However, this must be done through the court, not by self-help. You should strongly consider consulting with a New Jersey family law attorney to review your specific order and discuss your legal options, which may include filing an emergency application or motion to modify or suspend visitation. While I am an appellate lawyer in Maryland, I often advise clients that taking the proper procedural steps through court is the best way to protect both your rights and your credibility before the judge.