Can the clock for 12 months of legal separation be started even if the couple is involved in couples counseling?

This is a very good question because there are actually two facets to being separated, one being the physical separation and the other mental aspect being that at least one party's intent is that the separation is permanent.  It may seem that couples counseling would indicate that the parties do not intend the separation to be permanent and are in fact, to the contrary, trying to reconcile.  But I do not believe that the intent for the separation to be permanent means that the parties cannot have any doubts.  I think you can explore all of your options, including the possibility of working things out, while still presently intending the separation to be permanent.  This may sound like some fancy mental gymnastics, but in reality, when it comes time to verify your separation under oath, how is anyone going to get inside your head to dispute what your true intent was.  And if your spouse wants the divorce, too, then why would anyone want to dispute your intent. However, in the event that your spouse may want to dispute that it was your intent for the separation to be permanent, you would want to be careful of what you actually say that would reveal that it is NOT your intent to remain separate.  If your spouse tries to bring in statements you make during counseling sessions, this would raise some interesting legal questions about both doctor-patient privilege and spousal privilege, that may or may not prevent them from using this against you.   The bottom line is that I think as a matter of public policy, it would have a chilling effect on people working on possibly salvaging their marriages if they are afraid to participate in couple's counseling for fear of interrupting their separation period.  I think it would be against the commonwealth's interest in preserving families.  I have never heard of this being used against anyone and I can't imagine a judge denying a divorce on this basis.   This answer is given in accordance with the laws of Virginia and may not be applicable in any other state.  It should not be construed as legal advice, as that would require a more thorough analysis of all of the facts involved in a specific case.  If you need further information or assistance, please feel free to contact my office for a consultation. Case results depend upon a variety of factors unique to each case. Case results do not guarantee or predict a similar result in any future case.