Domestic violence and sealed/expunged records

This is more of a criminal law question than a family law question -- it would be whether there is any record of the incident ever occurring, and what if anything you need to report on employment applications, etc.  I can't tell whether what you describe really qualifies as an "arrest"; certainly, there was no conviction.  As to whether any record exists, I suggest contacting a criminal defense attorney and asking that question; if so, you can ask whether there is any need, or means, of sealing it.