How does husband file divorce and what happens to the kids, etc.?

You should try your very best to find her address. (It's not always as hard as it appears. For example, lots of people move to California. You can get into the Motor Vehicle Bureau's records for small or no cost. You could also try some of the People Finder apps. on the web. These cost, but not a whole lot. A private investigator might set you back $500 to $1,000, but is the surest route. If you do hire an investigator, check with other people who have hired him or her: some of them are very good, and many are not.) If after you make diligent enough efforts you cannot locate her, the court will probably let you serve her with the divorce papers by publication in the state newspaper which has a contract with the state to publish legal notices, and also in the newspaper of largest circulation in the area where she lived most recently, based on your checking. Of course, hire a skilled divorce lawyer, who can take care of all of this for you, and give you advice and representation. It's almost always worth the investment.