I am guardian/conservator to my married post stroke totally paralyzed 84 year old mother. her husband has deserted her for 5 years. I need a divorce .

In Virginia, a person can get a divorce relatively easily if the married couple has been separate for more than one year, and the other party does not object to the divorce. If there is no objection by the other party, and they have been apart for as long as your question indicates, then your mother can get what is called an uncontested, no fault divorce. First, you must draft and file the divorce complaint. Then you must serve notice on the other party and give them a chance to respond. Then they have to have a witness testify to the fact that they have been living separate and apart for at least one year in a deposition. Then the deposition has to be filed with the court. After the court receives all this material, it is just a matter of time before the divorce is granted, the order is sent out to the parties and notice is sent to the department of vital records.