QUESTION
If I move out of our home with my children before my divorce, how will it impact me when we sell of our previous two homes?
Asked on Jul 16th, 2013 on Divorce - Oklahoma
More details to this question:
We were married for 8 years. We have both recognized it is over and there is no reconciliation. We have 2 homes together that we will sell before a divorce is final. He has sent me a very detailed agreement via text and email as far as agreeing to pay the LEGAL AMOUNT of child support and visitation with the kids. In the email, he also agreed to give me half the profits of the sale of both homes. He has many accounts and a 401k that was started after we were married. Am I entitled to 1/2 of the 401k? He wants the kids and I out so that he can "work" on the house for sale. How will I negatively be impacted if I do move out before the divorce? By the way he does not want to give me a divorce till January 2014. Will it look as if I am abandoning the marriage? In the emailed agreement, his 1st sentence states that I am not abandoning if I move. What can I do to safely get out of this marriage and be financially okay every month? I just returned to work as a teacher last year after staying home with our girls for a couple of years. Is the agreement he sent legal? Should I trust him? He stated instead of a divorce lawyer, we can go through mediation. Is he just being sly and taking advantage of my vulnerability. Another crucial piece of information that I am not proud of, I was not faithful during the past 2 years. Understandably, I'm being called every name in the book. My children were NEVER in harms way, nor did I use any money during my unfaithfulness. Could my past behavior indicate how much child support my daughters would receive? Or the amount of time awarded to each of us? 8 years ago I was abused by him, called the authorities but because I was pregnant decided to drop charges. There was always physical abuse off and on but I stuck around for the kids. I would also want to claim them on tax but he refuses to let me. Please understand that I am an educated woman who was scared and alone. But now I'm willing to put up a good fight to do what's best for my daughters .
4 ANSWERS
Suzanne H. Lombardi
You bring up a number of points that cannot be answered in one fell swoop. I would suggest you obtain the services of an attorney even if it is just to look over the paperwork. I would not leave the marital home as you will never be able to get back in if you do. Your infidelity should not be a factor as Alaska is a no-fault state which means whatever you did short of domestic violence is not what the court will focus on. If there was domestic violence during your marriage you should let the court know and it could affect his visitation with the children. For all of the rest of the issues I would hire counsel. I would not enter any agreement with him without getting another opinion or what the attorney advises.
Answered on Jul 19th, 2013 at 4:25 AM
Appellate Attorney serving Grosse Pointe Farms, MI
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Musilli Brennan Associates, PLLC
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You need to at least get some legal counsel regarding your rights and reasonable expectations. If you are in Michigan call to engage us with the details.
Answered on Jul 18th, 2013 at 4:32 AM
Administrative Law Attorney serving Edmond, OK
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Jencks Law Firm P.L.L.C.
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It should not impact you if you move out of the homes pending the sale of the homes, however, you do not have to move out unless you want too or a court orders you to move. You are entitled to half of the money of all accounts, savings, checking, 401k, retirement, as well as half of the equity of both marital homes if the money was all invested and or accrued during the marriage. You are also responsible for half of any marital debt which can be netted out of the assets. Additionally, child support will not be affected by any bad act on your part. The courts do not want to know about those things unless it affects the children or the finances. In Oklahoma, child support is based on both of your incomes with a percentage of that being paid in child support to the custodial parent. You do not want to agree to anything unless you at least consult a lawyer. It looks like you have a lot of marital assets to divide as well as children and custody issues and you need to know your rights. If you want a divorce you should file for one now. You do not have to wait until the house is sold. He may try to cheat you out of your equity if you are still married and you don't have a court order giving you your half when the houses sell. There are a lot of issues that you need addressed. You need to contact an experienced family law attorney in your area.
Answered on Jul 18th, 2013 at 4:31 AM
Business Law Attorney serving Bingham Farms, MI
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James T. Weiner, P.C.
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No matter what you do mediation or settlement you need the advise of a divorce/family law attorney.. do not do this without hiring one Interview several find one you are comfortable with.. find a negotiator that is willing to be tough if necessary.. one that will explain things to you This said Infidelity should not effect child support.. It can effect distribution of marital assets (% each gets of estate) and spousal support the emails/texts as proof that he wants you out and that you are not abandoning the home..
Answered on Jul 18th, 2013 at 4:31 AM