my ex and I have joint custody of our children. During his parenting time my 13 yr old daughter called me crying and came to my work extremely upset.

I have seen your question.  My name is David Salvaggio.  I head a law firm that devotes its practice exclusively to New Jersey Divorce and Family Law matters.  It's all we do. Please feel free to take a look at our Firm Website (www.salvaggiolaw.net), which contains a lot of helpful information.  Have you spoken to your ex about the issue?  If not, you should try to do that. If your ex and you cannot come to an agreement as to what to do, you may need to have a Motion filed with the Court.  In that event, I believe that you should meet as soon as possible with a very experienced lawyer who devotes his/her practice to New Jersey Divorce and Family Law matters.     Go over your situation in detail with the attorney, get educated answers to your questions, and obtain expert guidance as to the best course of action. In my opinion, it will be well worth the cost of the meeting. Your question does not specify the town in which you live.  My firm's offices are located in Morristown, NJ (Morris County).  If you would like to schedule a meeting with me, please call us.  Our telephone number is 973-455-1220. Please leave a voice mail message if I am not available to speak with you when you call.