What do I do when my ex is behind almost $10,000 in child support and still owes you a judgement from 2009 divorce decree?

First, we get child support basically after the state enforces it (normally 90 day process) and he pays a few months and then stops again, having to wait the entire process all over again. This has been going on since 2009. He’s almost $10,000 behind and he's gone way longer than 4-5 months with no payment before, they have never done a thing to him. What can I do with this? Next, in October 2009, after 3.5 years of a divorce case in which I paid for and he only showed up for one hearing. I was awarded around $12,000 he owes me for lawyer bills in two different states, alimony and other things the judge granted which he has never paid on. In August of 2015, my son who is 13 now and he hasn't seen in ten years asked to have his last name changed to mine. After a hearing with the judge it was granted, so the judge obviously saw he has nothing to do with my child’s life. What I don’t quite understand is how he gets out of paying everything when anyone else I know misses a child support payment is behind bars or in trouble yet he’s never got anything. It makes no sense to me and I’m afraid to pay for a lawyer again, because even if I do win, it doesn’t mean I will ever get the money he owes me. I am at a loss here.