I filed a "Partition Action" suit against my ex boyfriend, he received the paperwork, but the courts are telling me that there are steps to follow

Everyone has to follow the court rules. Unless you have proper service of process under the court rules the ex-BF is not served. You also have to file the return of service. Bottom line, the rules are the rules and unless you follow them, the court won't help. A partition of land requires a lot of work, if you get it wrong, when the time comes, you will not be able to sell the property. Lawyers may cost money; it is the money they save you in the future that is our real value. I hope this helps. Good luck to you.