How do I change my status without being banned or marriage?

You cannot. You were adopted too late for your mother to petition for you and adjust your status. If you entered the US lawfully, at this point, you are only going to be able to legalize your status on the basis of a valid marriage to a US citizen.

You will need to see an immigration attorney and bring the paperwork which was previously filed and denied for review. However, there may not be many options open to you at this time.

You cannot adjust status through the adoption. You need another way. Your question does not provide enough facts to provide options.

You have to have a basis to get your permanent residence. For a family petition, it will be the spouse or parent of a US citizen. Your aunt's adoption is ineffective as it was completed after your 16th birthday, and you would still have to have met the 2-year physical custody requirement.

Sounds like someone made lots of decisions for you and may have created some real problems with your case ever being resolved. Best advice is to find a qualified and knowledgeable immigration attorney who can review what has been done, explain it to you and figure out whether there are an long term or permanent problems created as a result of what someone decided to do to "help" you. Your case has seen some difficulties and rather than letting someone else who hasn't a clue play with your future, do yourself a favor and find someone who understand the law and can explain everything to you. Do not settle for an unqualified legal service provider and I would highly recommend a Board Certified Immigration and Nationality Law attorney. These folks are qualified to call themselves experts and can really help you where others just don't get it. Find someone good and pay the fee for a real consultation and get a second opinion if you have any doubts.