car was in accident and now car is total loss

First, make that careless boyfriend of yours buy you a new car. Then dump him. (Just  kidding). Seriously though, I hope he's paying all your out-of-pocket expenses, including the damage to the neighbor's yard. At the very least. There's no way you should be paying for any of this. Be persistent with your insurance company about your auto damage claim. Make sure you get the claims rep everything they need. You may need to sue your insurance company to pay for the auto damage. It's ridiculous, since that's why you pay your collision premiums, but often necessary. I hope the bf was on your policy because if not, that could be an issue.  Also, brace yourself. You may be sued if the other driver decides he or she is injured and gets a lawyer. This is just because you're the car owner.  It will be an inconvenience, but nothing more.