Do I need to change our trust and will?

Do you have access to the trust document?  There may be provisions in it that govern how it may be amended or revoked.  Read it.  If your husband is not willing to amend the trust, you will want to revoke it.  Follow the procedures for revoking the trust written in the trust document.  If the trust document is silent on the matter, you will want to send a letter to your husband (who I assume is a co-trustee of the trust) telling him that you are revoking the trust.  Give a copy of that letter to someone you trust. If you did a will that leaves everything to your trust (called a "pour over will"), you will want to do a new will that revokes the old one and provides for distribution to your children (or to whomever you want).  I strongly urge you to seek legal counsel on this.  If you don't trust your husband and his children, you need to get copies of whatever you do to someone you do trust - someone who can locate the originals of your new documents and submit them to a probate court when you die.  If your husband is willing to amend your trust, things will be far easier, but I still suggest you obtain legal counsel.  I've seen far too many "do it yourself" trusts that fail to do what the settlor / grantor / trustor (person creating the trust - all of these words mean the same thing) wanted.

It's never a good idea to prepare legal documents without a lawyer.  You have a complicated situation since you both have children from previous marriages.  Your first step would be to meet with a qualified estate planning attorney who can assess your situation and advise you as to what you should do.  You will need to know whose name is currently on the deed of the house and how it is listed i.e. joint tenants or tenants in common.  You will also need to know if it was purchased during the marriage.  If you bring in your existing documents, the attorney will be able to advise you.