Does Evidence or Personal Testimony Make the Difference?

You can file a petition for guardianship with the court and if the court feels it's warranted, it will send an investigator to the person's house to investigate and report to the court. The court may also appoint a lawyer for your relative. There will be a hearing at which you must present "clear and convincing" evidence of your relative's incompetency. If your allegations are found to be true, the court can appoint you guardian and give you authority in any or all areas, ranging from making health care and financial decisions, deciding whether the relative should be in a nursing home, applying for Medicaid on their behalf, hiring home health aides, requesting that bank accounts be frozen if they've been taken advantage of by dishonest people, etc.  If the person is under 65 and has assets, you may be able to set up a special needs trust to enable them to collect government benefits but still have use of their money.  But ultimately, there is no way to hide the fact that you are guardian and when you file your petition, all of your relatives close family members must be notified, as well. There is nothing secretive about this- just the opposite. While a court is not going to order you to personally supervise the cleaning of their apartment, if your intention is to avoid all contact with this person, you might not be the best person to file the petition.