QUESTION
What can I do to get my mother's remains from my grandmother?
Asked on Mar 14th, 2013 on Estate Planning - Texas
More details to this question:
On July 30, 2012, my mother was in a tragic accident. On July 31, 2012 she was taken off life support. Her funeral was held August 5, 2012. That was the last time I had seen my mother's remains. My mother has 5 surviving children. I am the oldest. My brother and I have paid the funeral cost from her life insurance policy. My mothers' mom, who has not had contact with her before she passed away for more than 12 years, has possession of them. She refuses to let my brother or I to have the urn with our mother remain even though we have paid the cost of the funeral. I want to know what I can do to get my mother's remains from my grandmother.
6 ANSWERS
Real Property Attorney serving Utica, MI
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Douglas A. Tull, P.C. Attorney at Law
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Perhaps you could file an action in court and ask a court to order the remains to be turned over to you. Not sure of the legal theory. The fact that you paid the funeral bill doesn't give you a right to the remains. Your grandmother (her mother) is a "next of kin", just like you (as a child) - at least under the laws of intestacy in Michigan. So she may have a right to the remains - on an equal footing to yours. Perhaps a judge will be willing to play Solomon and divide the ashes amongst the next of kin.
Answered on Mar 19th, 2013 at 3:08 PM
Business Planning Attorney serving Livonia, MI
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Frederick & Frederick Attorneys at Law
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This is a tough question, all the way around. You want to look at MCL 700.3206, which you can find, here: http://www.legislature.mi.gov/(S(fhlhef55yoea1j55gmpy4p2c))/mileg.aspx?page=getObject&objectName=mcl-700-3206 You also want to review the Frequently asked questions pamphlet, published by the Michigan Funeral Information Society, here: http://www.funeralinformationsociety.org/images/Pamplets/Michigan%20FAQs%20Updated.pdf It appears that your grandmother never should have received the cremains, in the first place. How you get them now could be problematic. You can try contacting her first and requesting them. If that does not work, you can have a lawyer follow up with a letter demanding their return. If that does not work, you would need to decide whether to file a small claims action against her or take her to district court. None of that sounds like a particularly pleasant way to go. Depending on your grandmother's age and health, you might just decide to wait her out. Upon her death, presumably, you would all be entitled to her estate, which would then include the cremains. I am sure there are other options, as well. Perhaps you can discuss this with her and work it out. All of you are grieving and I am sure it is not the case that anyone is grieving worse than anyone else. Finding a way to honor your mother by getting along as a family would certainly be best, if this is possible. I am sorry for your loss and I wish you the best of luck in sorting this out.
Answered on Mar 15th, 2013 at 6:15 AM
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Does your mother's Will address her remains? Does it dispose of them to anyone? Who is named to serve as her Executrix/Executor. If it is her mother, you will have a difficult and possibly unwinnable battle. If not, then you may have a better chance of success. In either event, I suggest that you speak with a probate attorney about the issues, possible remedies and costs associated with bringing an action to recover the remains.
Answered on Mar 14th, 2013 at 2:50 PM
Thomas Edward Gates
You can file a motion in court for the release of her remains.
Answered on Mar 14th, 2013 at 2:50 PM
Commercial Contracts Attorney serving Boise, ID
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Peters Law, PLLC
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Sue her for possession.
Answered on Mar 14th, 2013 at 2:49 PM
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I am going to need more information on this. My suspicion is that you can file an action in probate court to have the remains returned to the family. However, I need to know if there's a will, if all children agree, etc.
Answered on Mar 14th, 2013 at 2:49 PM