Who to trust to be executor of our will?

In cases like yours, where you may not have a good individual choice for Executor, I often suggest using a corporate fiduciary. This is either a bank or brokerage affilated trust department or an independent trust company. The actual costs will vary depending on what services they actually end up providing, but I think it's money well spent in many cases. If you have questions about potential fees, you should contact potential providers directly. Please note: In most cases, individuals are also entitled to fees for serving as Executor (or Trustee) and those fees can end up being in the same range as the fees charged by a corporate fiduciary. However, in many cases it is the individual fiduciary who ends up making mistakes or just not getting things done, so you can end up paying for worse service. Corporate fiduciaries aren't for everyone, but they are definitely for some people. Have an experienced estate planning attorney help you consider your estate planning. The attorney will generally have worked with a number of corporate fiduciaries and can often help you find some good options to consider and choose from. Best wishes to you.